The Night Before

Tomorrow is the big day. The first day of school for both Jack and Joey. They could not be more displeased.

It all started with Jack. Jack is my kid who doesn't deal well with change and is well, difficult, I guess you could say. He is smart and funny and can be so kind but he is not what I would describe as easy going. There is no rolling with the punches with this kid. He wants to do things on his terms, his way, the way he wants when he wants. Like most 5 year olds he isn't keen on rules and being told what he has to do. Like, you know, going to kindergarten.

I don't even think it's the going to school part that is causing us so many problems. It is the fact that he is going to a new school with new friends. And oh my God nothing will be the same as it was at my school...if I had a quarter for every time I have heard that in the past month. Since my kids go to a private preschool they have to start fresh at the public school for kindergarten. The kids in preschool are from all over town so they all end up dispersed in our towns many elementary schools. Jack knows no one in his new class. And so the anxiety begins.

About a week or two ago he started telling us he WAS NOT GOING. Period. End of discussion. He didn't care that we were the boss and that we said he had to go, he was not going to do it. He also informed us he was not going to listen to his teacher, he was not going to read and he was not, under any circumstances, going to learn and be smart. No way, no how.

See what I mean? Difficult. So we have listened to his concerns (that he won't like it there and he won't have any friends) and we've tried to reassure him to the best of our abilities. But I will admit after weeks of this, Jay and I are running short on patience and high on YOU WILL GO AND YOU WILL LIKE IT. So there's that. No one is happy and no one is winning.

He saw his classroom today and met his teacher (who seems like the best kindergarten teacher ever) and even met a few boys from his class who he promptly told me he probably wouldn't be friends with as they ran off to play. *Deep breaths...*

I know he is nervous for tomorrow morning and so am I. I want nothing more for my baby to be smiling and confident on his first day of school. It would be icing on the cake if he would actually be polite and pleasant. I am scared for what tomorrow morning brings. I don't want my kid to hate school - or me for making him go.

Then there is Joey. My sweet faced, special child. He is starting preschool tomorrow at the same school Jack just left. He will have the same teacher his brother had in 3 year old preschool and still he did nothing but cling to my leg and suck his thumb at his open house the other night. He tells me he wants to go to school but he wants me to go with him - and his blankie to come too.

So there are two boys upstairs sleeping who will be off to school in the morning (even if the first day is only like an hour and a half long!) My stress and anxiety level is running high tonight and I am praying and begging the sweet baby Jesus the morning goes smoothly. Hoping that my boys although hesitant will walk into school scared but walk out smiling, happy.

Keep your fingers crossed for us, won't you? On second thought you better cross your toes too.

My Turkeys.

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