Bad Days

I get that as a parent you are bound to have some rough days. I understand that there will be moments when you look at your life, full of craziness, and wonder what is going on and how you got there. I have had those kinds of days, weeks even.

But lately, I have had more bad days than good. The truth of this makes me incredibly sad.

I am not sure what is causing the problem with my boys. Their ages or close proximity in age? The fact that they want for nothing and are pretty spoiled by all that know them? My lack of follow-through and constant need to make them happy? That they are just boys?

I just don't know. I think it is most likely a combination of all of these things and they are colliding at just the right time these days creating the perfect storm within our house. I am starting to think none of us are happy.

It is embarrassing to say they are just out of control. As in they have gone bat-shit crazy and act like animals wherever and whenever they want. They do not listen to me. AT ALL.

When I was younger and would hang out with kids who behaved like animals I remember not liking them. I remember talking about how obnoxious they were and how their family was a disaster. Perhaps this is karma biting me in the ass. Point well made.

Lately our house is filled with mis-behaving, tantruming, rambunctious, defiant children. It is also filled with screaming, threatening, miserable parents. No one is winning. They are not getting it and we are beyond frustrated with them and each other. We always want it to be somebodies fault the kids are behaving this way so we generally blame each other.

It is me saying things like if you didn't all wrestle with them and play so rough then maybe they wouldn't be punching each other all the time and him shooting back things like if you only followed through with one thing maybe they wouldn't tell you to F off when you threaten them. And so on.

Already today Jack has thrown two epic tantrums (yes, he is 5 and should be over tantrum throwing but he is apparently holding on to the habit), broken a glass pane in a door in my house, gotten into a boxing match at the deli and sprayed each other with applesauce during lunch. It is 1:10pm and both of them are in their beds and will most likely stay there the remainder of the day.

Someone please tell me how to do this right because after all that I just sit in tears, my throat raw from screaming, knowing damn well no one is listening. I don't want to be the mom with bad kids. I don't want to have to scream and yell and I don't want people to stare at me in public thinking they are so happy those aren't their kids!

I need help but I have no idea what that help is and where to find it. All I know is this is hard and we are unhappy and I don't want kids that act like assholes.

Send help or vodka or the number to the local orphanage or I am going to need more wooden spoons and a divorce lawyer stat.

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