Not Nice

I am at the point in my life where I am starting to care less and less. Wait, that isn’t really what I meant to say. What I mean is I am caring less and less about people who are assholes and treat people badly. I have always been the kind of person who feels bad for the person that is disliked. For the person left out, made fun of or embarrassed. Does that mean that I never made fun of someone or purposely tried to exclude him or her from something? No. I am human and when I think back on those instances (at least the ones I can recall) I feel bad. Or mostly bad – there were a few people who were treated this way because they deserved it, asked for it even.

I am the kind of person that likes to be liked. Can I deal with people not liking me? Yes. But it depends on who it is and why they don’t like me.  If my old boss doesn’t like me for quitting my job after I was mistreated at the company, I could care less. If my ex-boyfriends new girlfriend dislikes me, for whatever reason, I am over it. If someone whom I have never met or do not know dislikes me that is a problem. I want to fix that – make them see how likable I am! Really, try me out and you will see I am fun and not at all as horrible as you are imagining.

There our people in my life or my family’s lives that mistreat us. I have come to learn that this happens for all different reasons and in many different forms. One thing I am learning is that people mistreat you because you allow them to. They take you for granted, use you and then treat you like garbage because you don’t stop them. This is a continual pattern. We drop everything and come running when they need us, only to be criticized, talked down to and offended. For some reason we keep signing up for more.

We do this because of the fear.  I am just one big scaredy cat who is trying to play nice with everyone. I don’t want to have to deal with the backlash I would get if I actually told one of these jerks they were assholes. That they were the kind of people no one wanted to play with because they are mean. And we all know mean people suck.

At some point, which is what I am working on, this has to stop. It has to stop whether it is a family member, friend or acquaintance that is doing it. I am not your doormat! You are no better than me or anyone else and I could give two shits if you don’t like me or are mad at me! This is my pep talk to myself….pretty convincing, huh? I said I was working on it. In the meantime, I believe in karma. What goes around comes around so stop being an asshole.


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