When things are going bad in your life, it is super easy to be a negative nancy. It is only human nature to think things like why me and can't I just get a break. Things have been trying for our family the last few months. We thought selling our house so quickly was a huge blessing, but then the actually process to get to closing were hard, extremely long and time-consuming, and just draining, in general. I wasn't sure we were ever going to close. We did, it took months and a whole lot of hoop jumping, but we did.
Since I believed selling my house was going to be the difficult part of moving, you can only imagine my surprise when we sold the house and our biggest issue became us not finding a new house to buy. It is like the housing market started booming the minute Jason and I were actually looking to buy. Still, we were positive about selling and knew we had Grandma's house to stay at until we found the perfect home for us.
Then the flood came. It was too much for me and at this point, after weeks of packing and moving, I couldn't find one single positive thing we had going for us. We had no where to live, our cars were severley damaged, if not totaled and all our stuff was destroyed. Yes, I know we were all safe. Yes, I know we were all healthy and alive. Yes, I get it, logically. But emotionally? I was done. I had been putting so much into getting our house to close and then to packing up and moving and then for the house to fill with water destroying all our stuff? No, no, no, no. That I couldn't do. I just kind of went through the motions and was kind of unable to deal. I threw my stuff out, I cleaned and bleached and we ripped out walls. It was like I was living in someone else's nightmare.
I felt helpless, sad, angry and frustrated. In my mind I wasn't sure how we were going to figure this all out. I needed to buy a house, possibly two cars and replace 75% of the stuff I had stored in the basement (which was so. much. stuff.) It was just too overwhelming.
But then....then I received an email from a mom at Joey's preschool that was sent out to all the preschool parents stating that she was hosting a "shower" for my family to help us replace the things we lost. I was shocked. This mom, who I am friendly with but by no means knows me enough to think she needs to throw me a shower, took it upon herself to help us. Then she got the whole class to rally around us.
It was nothing short of spectacular. They threw us an amazing party complete with a bounce house and babysitters for the kids. They brought food and wine and so, so many gifts. They saved me a little that day by reminding me that no matter how bad things may seem, there is always good.
Their generosity and support is something I will never forget. They donated books for the boys, houseware items for us and toys. They gave us gift cards to replace things that were lost and mostly they came and hung out. They offered hugs and comforting words and just overwhelmed me with their kindness.
There were people that came, donated and supported my family that I had never even met. That is amazing. That is proof that there are good, even great, people in this world. I am so blessed that my son gets to go to school with some of them.
I will pay this forward someday. Someday I will see someone, or a family, like mine, that is going through something rough, something hard. I will step up and I will rally around them and if I can make them feel even the slightest bit like our preschool families made me feel, then I will have succeeded.
So when you are in line at Starbucks tomorrow, consider picking up the tab on the coffee for the person in line behind you. When you are at the grocery store and the person in front of you is short a few bucks, offer to help. It may be the best part of their day, and yours.
To all our friends who have supported us, taken the boys for playdates and bought or donated so much stuff to my family, thank you from the bottom of my heart. Thanks to you, I am back to seeing things in a more positive light.
xoxo
When it Rains....it Pours
One week ago today we moved out of our home and into Jason's grandparents house. Our house sold quickly and since we have not been able to find a new home in the area of our town we want to live in, we decided to camp out in his grandparents' (who are both deceased) empty house across town.
It was not an ideal situation, but we were thankful to have a place to call home while we continued our home search. So we packed up and moved in. We also rented a POD that would hold our non-necessity items such as a few pieces of furniture and things like garage items that we wouldn't be needing during our short stay at grandma's house. Everything else came with us.
Grandma's house is big enough to fit us in terms of bedrooms, etc but not all of our stuff was going to fit so most of it stayed packed up and was stored in the basement. The house is a split-level with the garage going under the house. There is a family room even with the garage (which is half underground) and then a sub-basement that was unfinished where the laundry was. That is where we stored all of our crap.
I will admit, we were well aware of the times grandmas house had flooded in the past. The last time it flooded was in 2010 and it was bad enough to cause damage to the sub-basement, family room and garage. As we were carrying all of our possessions down into that basement when we were moving in, Jason and I both kept repeating this basement better not flood. I know, we are stupid. Why would we ever move all our stuff in a basement that we knew had filled with water in the past? Well, honestly, we had no choice. There was no where else to put it and it hadn't flooded in years and the city surely had better control of the faulty sewer system by now....I know. We should have listened to our gut.
When the weatherman warned of the rain coming and of the possibility of flooding, Jason and I went down and made sure that only our rubbermaid bins of items were on the floor and that all our boxes were stacked on top of the bins or on tables. I made sure that all our super important, precious items were in bins, such as pictures, kids artwork, Christmas decorations, all our personal "office" documents, etc. I figured if we got any seepage, our stuff would be dry in those bins.
We moved in on a Saturday. The very next Wednesday the rain started. It was pretty much non-stop and we kept a close eye on the basement and it was dry. We went to bed at 1am on Wednesday night feeling confident that we would be okay since there was no standing water in the yard, the street or pooling at the bottom of the driveway by the garage door (remember it slopes down to the house like underground parking.)
Joey woke us up at 5am on Thursday morning telling us that we were flooding. Obviously with us both being half-asleep we told him we weren't and that he should go back to bed. He just kept telling us he could hear water. We told him it was just the rain. At 5:20am Jay's cell phone rang and as he ran downstairs to answer it I have never heard him scream like he did that morning. Needless to say, by then the water was pouring into the family room through the garage and the entire garage, family room and sub-basement were under water. The street and both our front and back yard were completely filled with water. We had both our cars parked in the slanted driveway and both of those were also filled with water.
I have never seen anything like it.
It was not an ideal situation, but we were thankful to have a place to call home while we continued our home search. So we packed up and moved in. We also rented a POD that would hold our non-necessity items such as a few pieces of furniture and things like garage items that we wouldn't be needing during our short stay at grandma's house. Everything else came with us.
Grandma's house is big enough to fit us in terms of bedrooms, etc but not all of our stuff was going to fit so most of it stayed packed up and was stored in the basement. The house is a split-level with the garage going under the house. There is a family room even with the garage (which is half underground) and then a sub-basement that was unfinished where the laundry was. That is where we stored all of our crap.
I will admit, we were well aware of the times grandmas house had flooded in the past. The last time it flooded was in 2010 and it was bad enough to cause damage to the sub-basement, family room and garage. As we were carrying all of our possessions down into that basement when we were moving in, Jason and I both kept repeating this basement better not flood. I know, we are stupid. Why would we ever move all our stuff in a basement that we knew had filled with water in the past? Well, honestly, we had no choice. There was no where else to put it and it hadn't flooded in years and the city surely had better control of the faulty sewer system by now....I know. We should have listened to our gut.
When the weatherman warned of the rain coming and of the possibility of flooding, Jason and I went down and made sure that only our rubbermaid bins of items were on the floor and that all our boxes were stacked on top of the bins or on tables. I made sure that all our super important, precious items were in bins, such as pictures, kids artwork, Christmas decorations, all our personal "office" documents, etc. I figured if we got any seepage, our stuff would be dry in those bins.
We moved in on a Saturday. The very next Wednesday the rain started. It was pretty much non-stop and we kept a close eye on the basement and it was dry. We went to bed at 1am on Wednesday night feeling confident that we would be okay since there was no standing water in the yard, the street or pooling at the bottom of the driveway by the garage door (remember it slopes down to the house like underground parking.)
Joey woke us up at 5am on Thursday morning telling us that we were flooding. Obviously with us both being half-asleep we told him we weren't and that he should go back to bed. He just kept telling us he could hear water. We told him it was just the rain. At 5:20am Jay's cell phone rang and as he ran downstairs to answer it I have never heard him scream like he did that morning. Needless to say, by then the water was pouring into the family room through the garage and the entire garage, family room and sub-basement were under water. The street and both our front and back yard were completely filled with water. We had both our cars parked in the slanted driveway and both of those were also filled with water.
I have never seen anything like it.
Our garage.
Our cars after Jason tried to save mine by pulling it up out of the driveway.
Jason's car after he rescued mine.
Our street.
Looking into the family room.
Family room
Pumping out the driveway, then garage.
Starting to pump out the sub-basement.
All my stuff floating around the basement.
What was left after the water was gone.
The first (there were two like this) garbage haul.
Needless to say, the weathermen were right. There was a great chance of flooding. Once again, Elmhurst's city sewer system couldn't keep up with the amount of water we had and the result was total disaster for many, many people around town.
The kids were scared and freaking out about their toys floating by in the family room, unable to save any of them. They knew all their toys, books, Wii and Legos were all down there. I knew that every art project they ever made, every journal I ever wrote in and every photo I had saved since junior high on were in that basement. My computer and both back-up hard drives were down there and every piece of sports memorabilia Jason had from all his years of playing and coaching were trapped in the water as well.
There was 6 1/2 feet of water in our sub-basement and between 3 1/2 to 4 feet in the family room and garage. We had to haul the kids out of the house through the deep, cold water while Sugar just splashed and swam along with us. There was nothing but the sounds of sirens and helicopters in the air and people were being taken out of their homes by boat. Like I said, I never have seen anything like it.
By the time the water went down in the street we still had several hours of pumping to do in order to reveal the disaster that was now our house. We lost 80% of our stuff and both cars were badly damaged / totaled. To make things worse, our insurance company gave us the blow that the renters policy I secured for us prior to moving in did not cover flood. If I think about it in terms of all we lost, I literally feel like I am having an anxiety attack.
Instead, I am thankful that between my Mom and I, we were able to lay out thousands of photos and dry them. They aren't perfect and many were lost, but we saved most of them. We were able to wash most of the boys plastic toys and could save items like dishes that could be washed.
I am still heartbroken that I lost the contents of my computer including the videos of the boys first steps, first words and clips of them with their beloved Papa that we all loved watching so we could hear his voice again. I lost every Mother's Day and Father's Day project my kids had ever made amongst a ton of other special projects I had saved through the years.
It sucks. It was the worst timing for us and although so many people had flooding in their basements, they didn't have their entire life stored in it as it filled.
We are slowly getting back to normal and we were able to move back into the house last night. We are still cleaning up the mess and figuring out what was lost and how we can replace the necessities. It is physically and emotionally exhausting.
As always, we are feeling the love of our family and friends who have done so much for us. I am certain I would be curled up in the fetal position in a corner in my wellies if it wasn't for all the support we have gotten, so thank you so very much.
Next up for us, find a new house so we can start to rebuild ourselves a home. Hopefully one that does not require the use of my duck feet!
Five
Dear Joey,
You are five. Five. As in years old. Gah, saying it out loud kills me. You are that kid. You know the one that you love so much you want to squeeze him to death but at the same time you realize he might be trying to kill you. Yep, that's you.
I adore you. I really do, you are my sweet face, my baby and my shit-wrecker all wrapped into one gigantic force to be reckoned with. You are so big and strong and you remind me more of your Dad each day. You are also so, so difficult. Your personality is demanding and you do everything 110%. I wonder if you actually hear me when I am screaming at you for the 10 millionth time each day.
I really think God gave you to me to teach me how to be more patient and also to remind me that parenting a head-strong boy like you is hard-work.
Some of the greatest things about you are the hardest to deal with. You have no filter and although your Dad and I really get a kick out of some of the hysterical things you say, we have also both been extremely embarrassed by the random things you spew out whenever you feel the mood strike.
No matter how hard some of our days together might be, you still have the tendency to crawl in bed with me and snuggle up. You lay so close to me, touching me at all times and even though I want nothing more than to sleep untouched, I cling to those moments. I know they will be over all too soon. I am not quite ready for you to be an actual big kid yet. I still want my baby around.
You are smart, athletic and one of your favorite things to do is color. You are hug into sports and love playing hockey, flag football and swimming. You start baseball next week and I panic at the thought of you and a bat, but you are super excited to start playing. You are a hard-worker and always try hard at everything you do. You are not a quitter, instead you are always determined to be good at whatever you put your mind to. I could not be more proud of you.
I Hope this year brings you all you dreamed and that you have the greatest birthday yet. You may be my big guy, but you are also always going to be my baby.
I love you to the moon and back,
Mama
xoxo
You are five. Five. As in years old. Gah, saying it out loud kills me. You are that kid. You know the one that you love so much you want to squeeze him to death but at the same time you realize he might be trying to kill you. Yep, that's you.
I really think God gave you to me to teach me how to be more patient and also to remind me that parenting a head-strong boy like you is hard-work.
Some of the greatest things about you are the hardest to deal with. You have no filter and although your Dad and I really get a kick out of some of the hysterical things you say, we have also both been extremely embarrassed by the random things you spew out whenever you feel the mood strike.
No matter how hard some of our days together might be, you still have the tendency to crawl in bed with me and snuggle up. You lay so close to me, touching me at all times and even though I want nothing more than to sleep untouched, I cling to those moments. I know they will be over all too soon. I am not quite ready for you to be an actual big kid yet. I still want my baby around.
You are smart, athletic and one of your favorite things to do is color. You are hug into sports and love playing hockey, flag football and swimming. You start baseball next week and I panic at the thought of you and a bat, but you are super excited to start playing. You are a hard-worker and always try hard at everything you do. You are not a quitter, instead you are always determined to be good at whatever you put your mind to. I could not be more proud of you.
I Hope this year brings you all you dreamed and that you have the greatest birthday yet. You may be my big guy, but you are also always going to be my baby.
I love you to the moon and back,
Mama
xoxo
My Joey
My youngest son is well, let's just say, special. I have talked before about the lovely things he says here. He just says whatever he is thinking. He has no filter and doesn't understand the concept of things being rude or what "private family" things means. Once he starts, there is little you can do to stop him.
He brings a whole new meaning to the phrase kids say the darnedest things.
I head up to bed last week around midnight and within a few minutes my bedroom door creaks open and Joey comes stumbling in. I instantly go through the checklist of things that might bring him in. Do you feel sick? Did you pee your bed? Are you wheezy? Did you have a bad dream? It is mostly, always, one of these things prompting the visit.
This night he said he couldn't sleep. Since Jason was still downstairs watching TV I told him he could climb in to his Dad's spot in the bed and snuggle until Jay came up.
Just when I start to lull off to sleep this conversation takes place.
Mom, I saw this medicine on TV that you can take to help you get pregnant. It can even help you have two babies, which means you could have a baby brother and a baby sister growing in your belly at the same time.
What? Honey, there is no medicine to give Mom's babies. I already told you, bud, we aren't going to have a baby brother or sister.
I really want a baby brother and sister, Mom.
Why don't you snuggle up with me and let's get some sleep?
*He scooches over closer to me and snuggles up. I still can't believe he is talking to me about getting pregnant.*
I don't know what I am going to do when you are too big to snuggle with me.
I will always snuggle you mom. Although this is another reason you should take that medicine and have another baby.
Touche, child, touche. Also, I am pretty sure we are done taking that medicine around these parts.
It was only a day or two later that I overhear him talking to an HVAC guy we had in the house. I was carrying groceries in so I was going in and out of the house. On one of my trips in, I hear this....
I clog to toilet.
Oh no, I hope you don't put toys and stuff in the toilet. That's not good.
No! I don't put toys in the toilet, I clog it with my huge poops. My mom says I poop like my dad!
He was so proud to be telling the guy this that as I was dropping dead from embarrassment in the kitchen, I just couldn't bust in and ruin his proud moment. The kid works hard for those poops, after all.
Needless to say, we have been talking alot about what we say to strangers and what is considered private family talk. I also asked him to never talk to me about getting pregnant again. It creeped me out and I clearly need to start paying closer attention to the day time TV he is watching. He'll be asking me about ovulating next.
He brings a whole new meaning to the phrase kids say the darnedest things.
I head up to bed last week around midnight and within a few minutes my bedroom door creaks open and Joey comes stumbling in. I instantly go through the checklist of things that might bring him in. Do you feel sick? Did you pee your bed? Are you wheezy? Did you have a bad dream? It is mostly, always, one of these things prompting the visit.
This night he said he couldn't sleep. Since Jason was still downstairs watching TV I told him he could climb in to his Dad's spot in the bed and snuggle until Jay came up.
Just when I start to lull off to sleep this conversation takes place.
Mom, I saw this medicine on TV that you can take to help you get pregnant. It can even help you have two babies, which means you could have a baby brother and a baby sister growing in your belly at the same time.
What? Honey, there is no medicine to give Mom's babies. I already told you, bud, we aren't going to have a baby brother or sister.
I really want a baby brother and sister, Mom.
Why don't you snuggle up with me and let's get some sleep?
*He scooches over closer to me and snuggles up. I still can't believe he is talking to me about getting pregnant.*
I don't know what I am going to do when you are too big to snuggle with me.
I will always snuggle you mom. Although this is another reason you should take that medicine and have another baby.
Touche, child, touche. Also, I am pretty sure we are done taking that medicine around these parts.
It was only a day or two later that I overhear him talking to an HVAC guy we had in the house. I was carrying groceries in so I was going in and out of the house. On one of my trips in, I hear this....
I clog to toilet.
Oh no, I hope you don't put toys and stuff in the toilet. That's not good.
No! I don't put toys in the toilet, I clog it with my huge poops. My mom says I poop like my dad!
He was so proud to be telling the guy this that as I was dropping dead from embarrassment in the kitchen, I just couldn't bust in and ruin his proud moment. The kid works hard for those poops, after all.
Needless to say, we have been talking alot about what we say to strangers and what is considered private family talk. I also asked him to never talk to me about getting pregnant again. It creeped me out and I clearly need to start paying closer attention to the day time TV he is watching. He'll be asking me about ovulating next.
Forty
I can't say for sure, but I would assume that every girl dreams of having a sister. I mean, yeah they can be a royal pain in the ass sometimes, but having a sister is like having a built-in, ready made best friend.
Today is my sister Joy's fortieth birthday. I am not sure how that is possible because I swear we were just sharing a bedroom last year.
As an older sister, I know it could have been hard for her to always have me around. I always wanted to hang out with her and her friends. Most older sisters would have told me to scram, because no one wants their little sister hanging around all the time. She never did.
She took me everywhere with her. I went to the mall with her and her friends, out for lunch or ice-cream (we have a memorable trip to The Farm for custard that I will never forget) and she even took me to a high school dance with her. For real, she let me go with her to a high school dance with her friends when I was in the 7th or 8th grade. She was, for the most part, always nice to me.
I loved spending time with her.
She is one of the most caring people I know and she has changed her life in ways that I don't think many people would be able to do. She is strong, she is brave and she is loving.
Most of all, she is reliable. She has never let me down.
If I am feeling down in the dumps, need help putting things in perspective or just a good ol' talking off the ledge, she is there. I am so proud of who she is and how, no matter what, she is true to herself and fights for what she wants.
I am beyond lucky to have her as my sister, my much older sister.
Happy Birthday, Yoj!
I love you! xoxo
Today is my sister Joy's fortieth birthday. I am not sure how that is possible because I swear we were just sharing a bedroom last year.
As an older sister, I know it could have been hard for her to always have me around. I always wanted to hang out with her and her friends. Most older sisters would have told me to scram, because no one wants their little sister hanging around all the time. She never did.
She took me everywhere with her. I went to the mall with her and her friends, out for lunch or ice-cream (we have a memorable trip to The Farm for custard that I will never forget) and she even took me to a high school dance with her. For real, she let me go with her to a high school dance with her friends when I was in the 7th or 8th grade. She was, for the most part, always nice to me.
I loved spending time with her.
She is one of the most caring people I know and she has changed her life in ways that I don't think many people would be able to do. She is strong, she is brave and she is loving.
Most of all, she is reliable. She has never let me down.
If I am feeling down in the dumps, need help putting things in perspective or just a good ol' talking off the ledge, she is there. I am so proud of who she is and how, no matter what, she is true to herself and fights for what she wants.
I am beyond lucky to have her as my sister, my much older sister.
Happy Birthday, Yoj!
I love you! xoxo
Pretending
I would love to say I haven't been on here writing about the usual mundane things because I was vacationing or sitting around reading incredible books wearing sweatpants sipping Chai tea.
Sadly, that is not so.
Truth is, I have been swamped lately and I feel like all aspects of my life are literally swallowing me whole. So I do what anyone sinking might do....try like hell to keep my head up.
Basically what I've been doing is getting up, pulling myself together and pretending.
I'm making shit up as I go and desperately trying to survive without killing someone, myself included. I am not sure why it is that when one stressful thing happens twelve thousand more follow it. It is like the bad things call their friends and invite them to come on over. I must throw one helluva party because all the crap is having the best time turning my life to total shit.
But no one likes a Debbie Downer so, you know, I smile and am all yeah, everything is great! when really I want to scream my full on batshit crazy head off. I think if I could just lose it, I mean really lose it without anyone judging, I would feel so much better.
Since that seems to be frowned upon in society, mostly at school drop-off's, at the gym or in my office, I am just getting fabulously good at lying. Pretending my way through the rough spot, holding it together the best I can until it ends. Eventually the crap has got to get sick of this party and go the fuck home. Right?
Until then, my friends, we are faking it to make it around here. Don't judge, I could be the disheveled lady in the school parking lot ugly crying while picking up her kids from school. Let's hope that's not next week's post.
Sadly, that is not so.
Truth is, I have been swamped lately and I feel like all aspects of my life are literally swallowing me whole. So I do what anyone sinking might do....try like hell to keep my head up.
Basically what I've been doing is getting up, pulling myself together and pretending.
I'm making shit up as I go and desperately trying to survive without killing someone, myself included. I am not sure why it is that when one stressful thing happens twelve thousand more follow it. It is like the bad things call their friends and invite them to come on over. I must throw one helluva party because all the crap is having the best time turning my life to total shit.
But no one likes a Debbie Downer so, you know, I smile and am all yeah, everything is great! when really I want to scream my full on batshit crazy head off. I think if I could just lose it, I mean really lose it without anyone judging, I would feel so much better.
Since that seems to be frowned upon in society, mostly at school drop-off's, at the gym or in my office, I am just getting fabulously good at lying. Pretending my way through the rough spot, holding it together the best I can until it ends. Eventually the crap has got to get sick of this party and go the fuck home. Right?
Until then, my friends, we are faking it to make it around here. Don't judge, I could be the disheveled lady in the school parking lot ugly crying while picking up her kids from school. Let's hope that's not next week's post.
Seven
Today Jack turned seven. It feels monumental to me even though I know seven isn't really a big deal. I mean it isn't his golden birthday or as big of a deal as becoming a teen or anything, but for me, it seemed big.
He seems big. He is halfway through first grade and I feel like we are racing so fast that middle school is just a blink away. I know it is cliche to say, but it really does feel like it was just yesterday when I had him. He was a special little guy being born early, so tiny in our arms. He was (and still is) our sweet little turkey.
As I have said in years past here and here, Jack is not an easy kid, not that I think any child is. Lately, he seems bigger and older and has had an attitude to go with that. Some days are rougher than others, today was one of those days. So I am sitting here, writing my son his birthday letter after putting him to bed angry, yelling at him for bad behavior and listening to him cry.
It was not a good way to end a birthday. It was also not a proud parenting moment. Here's to hoping seven is luckier.
Dear Jack,
I adore you. I love the sound of your endless giggles when I pretend to eat the freckles of your cheeks and I love the feel of your growing arms wrapped tight around me for a hug goodnight. I can not get enough of you reading to me or telling me stories that you have made up in your head.
You are smart. Really, when you tell me you aren't smart and you can't do your spelling words I want nothing more to remind you, over and over again, that you are smart but you are just being a little too lazy. I love seeing you work hard.
You have a whole posse of friends and you are so lucky that you have the best friend in the world in your brother. You have even been able to successfully talk Joey into being your "butler" and he does whatever you ask of him 90% of the time. This goes back to how smart you are! Nice? Maybe not so much in this case, but you are so loved by your little brother.
This year you played baseball, flag football, continued swimming (which you can do with no swim belt anymore!) and hockey. You also participated in science classes and camps and went to zoo camp at the Brookfield Zoo. You are doing awesome in school and besides homework, it has been a great experience for you. It has been a busy year and you are not showing signs of slowing down anytime soon!
With all the good that you are, there always is some bad. You are hot-headed and boy, do you have a temper on you! You struggle with compromise and not always getting what you want, when you want it. I wish you could see just how lucky you are and how fortunate you are to have all you do. I am not sure if this behavior is because you are the older child or just plain old spoiled. My guess is it is a little of both. It is hard to teach you to be better because your Dad & I love giving you things and doing things with you. Unfortunately that is hard to do sometimes because you can get wrapped up in always wanting more. I hope as you mature you realize how much you have and how very loved you are.
Some of the moments I have felt proudest of you this year was when you wrote a letter to Santa and instead of asking for gifts for yourself, you asked him to bring the boys and girls who don't usually get presents a gift. Then on Martin Luther King Jr. day when your teacher asked you what your wish was for, you said that everyone in the world was safe. This, my love, is why you are incredibly special to me. Beneath all that spoiled kid is a kind-hearted, genuine person.
I wish you so much always, but I guess this year in particular I wish for you to continue to become confident in yourself and to not be afraid to stand up for yourselves or others, even if it isn't the cool thing to do. You are strong and brave and you can be a leader.
As for today, I am so sorry I put you to bed angry and that you were sad. It was a tough day for you and I am sorry you felt your special day was ruined. I hope tomorrow can be a better day for us both.
Happy Birthday, Turkey.
I love you to the moon and back,
Mama
He seems big. He is halfway through first grade and I feel like we are racing so fast that middle school is just a blink away. I know it is cliche to say, but it really does feel like it was just yesterday when I had him. He was a special little guy being born early, so tiny in our arms. He was (and still is) our sweet little turkey.
As I have said in years past here and here, Jack is not an easy kid, not that I think any child is. Lately, he seems bigger and older and has had an attitude to go with that. Some days are rougher than others, today was one of those days. So I am sitting here, writing my son his birthday letter after putting him to bed angry, yelling at him for bad behavior and listening to him cry.
It was not a good way to end a birthday. It was also not a proud parenting moment. Here's to hoping seven is luckier.
Dear Jack,
I adore you. I love the sound of your endless giggles when I pretend to eat the freckles of your cheeks and I love the feel of your growing arms wrapped tight around me for a hug goodnight. I can not get enough of you reading to me or telling me stories that you have made up in your head.
You are smart. Really, when you tell me you aren't smart and you can't do your spelling words I want nothing more to remind you, over and over again, that you are smart but you are just being a little too lazy. I love seeing you work hard.
You have a whole posse of friends and you are so lucky that you have the best friend in the world in your brother. You have even been able to successfully talk Joey into being your "butler" and he does whatever you ask of him 90% of the time. This goes back to how smart you are! Nice? Maybe not so much in this case, but you are so loved by your little brother.
This year you played baseball, flag football, continued swimming (which you can do with no swim belt anymore!) and hockey. You also participated in science classes and camps and went to zoo camp at the Brookfield Zoo. You are doing awesome in school and besides homework, it has been a great experience for you. It has been a busy year and you are not showing signs of slowing down anytime soon!
With all the good that you are, there always is some bad. You are hot-headed and boy, do you have a temper on you! You struggle with compromise and not always getting what you want, when you want it. I wish you could see just how lucky you are and how fortunate you are to have all you do. I am not sure if this behavior is because you are the older child or just plain old spoiled. My guess is it is a little of both. It is hard to teach you to be better because your Dad & I love giving you things and doing things with you. Unfortunately that is hard to do sometimes because you can get wrapped up in always wanting more. I hope as you mature you realize how much you have and how very loved you are.
Some of the moments I have felt proudest of you this year was when you wrote a letter to Santa and instead of asking for gifts for yourself, you asked him to bring the boys and girls who don't usually get presents a gift. Then on Martin Luther King Jr. day when your teacher asked you what your wish was for, you said that everyone in the world was safe. This, my love, is why you are incredibly special to me. Beneath all that spoiled kid is a kind-hearted, genuine person.
I wish you so much always, but I guess this year in particular I wish for you to continue to become confident in yourself and to not be afraid to stand up for yourselves or others, even if it isn't the cool thing to do. You are strong and brave and you can be a leader.
As for today, I am so sorry I put you to bed angry and that you were sad. It was a tough day for you and I am sorry you felt your special day was ruined. I hope tomorrow can be a better day for us both.
Happy Birthday, Turkey.
I love you to the moon and back,
Mama
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